The 10
keys to building a character of Trustworthiness are as follows;
1.
KEEP YOUR WORDS.
It’s
not going to be easy . But it will pay off on the long run . Your friends
should know you by your words.
If you
say you are coming to visit on Sunday make sure you visit on Sunday.
If you
tell your boss that you will be missing work because you are sick, hope it’s
the truth and not a way to miss work.
If you
tell your friend you are going to church, make sure it’s church you are going
and not to market.
If
your friend eventually sees you in market and not at church, it will take a lot
for you to convince your friend before they trust you again.
Words
are little but they matter a lot.
2.
BE COMMITTED.
Commitment
means: to carry into action deliberately. Deliberately keep your word and
actions.
If you
have an appointment with a friend or boss by 7:am, intentionally commit
yourself to wake up early and attend the appointment on time.
One of
my policy is arriving at the venue, church program or examination hall at least
20minutes early so that I will be relaxed, think and study my
environment.
And it
has helped me a lot.
3.
PAY YOUR DEBTS.
This
one has caused a lot of friendships to separate. Please if your friend gives you
something, try and return it even before they ask of it.
When
you borrow books from the library or your course mates, try and return
them.
If you
owe your friend some money, try and pay it on time. Otherwise, the next time
you might need their help they wouldn't be able to help you.
It’s
better you start paying half and complete it later. At least it’s a good
attempt.
Don’t
assume because they’re your friends, they will forget about it and not ask you.
PAY.
4. BE TRANSPARENT AND COMMUNICATE.
Don’t
live a life of suspicion. Be transparent with your dealings with friends,
families, course mates and everyone.
Don’t
allow people to assume what you are not by the way you act or talk. First
impressions count. Don’t be truthful today and lie tomorrow.
Be consistent
with good virtues. That’s where communication comes in. Because we are not in
control of what happens to us but we can control how we react to them.
Peradventure,
something came up and you couldn't meet up with an agreement, time,
invitation or whatever. If this was so, please communicate with your
friend.
Politely
tell them your reasons for not meeting up. So they don’t make
assumptions.
6.
BE KIND.
Honesty
and kindness always come first. Be kind to your friends and everyone around
you. If you love your friends, you will naturally want to be truthful to
them.
Even
if people or friends don’t treat you right, be kind to them.
Even
when they think your character is not truthful, don’t compromise. Some people
will like you to join them and have bad habits, they don’t like the fact that
your character judges them.
Be
careful with the friends and people you have around you. Kindness comes from
within. When you are kind to people, they get attracted to you.
7.
BE HUMBLE.
Trustworthy
people are humble and modest. They want their friends to grow and do well in
life.
Be
humble about your good character. Don’t rub it on the face of those who have
bad attitude.
8.
KEEP SECRETS.
Don’t
share your friend's secrets. Even when you quarrel with them in future, don’t
go about telling people the secrets they they once told you.
Let
their secrets be safe with you. The fact is that the people you discuss your
friends secrets with will not trust you. They will believe you will discuss
theirs with others too.
The
way I keep secrets is that, I tell myself to bury what others have told me in
my mind. Even if we are no longer friends I will never share it with anyone.
I
don’t tell my mum my dad's secrets. Neither do I tell my dad my mum's secrets.
Their secrets are safe with me. Because they might be testing me.
It’s
possible my mum will ask my dad, that "I told our daughter something, did
she tell you." If he says no, then it means she can always trust me at all
times.
Don’t
judge your friends when they open up to you about their secrets. Just give them
a listening ear and ask if they want your contributions.
Don’t
request your friends to share their secrets. It will make you inquisitive. Just
allow them to take their time and trust you with theirs.
9.
BE DISCIPLINED.
Discipline
yourself to be a trustworthy friend. Be careful with your words and actions.
People are always watching.
10.
PRAY TO GOD FOR GRACE TO DEVELOP A TRUSTWORTHY CHARACTER.
It
takes grace to be a trusty person in a world full of evil and compromise.
Always pray to God for grace to be committed to your friends, work , school and
every other thing.
Except
the Lord helps you, you will only struggle and have character issues.
I love
you all.
May
the Lord bless Ghana and Africa as a whole.
Kind regards,
Ms. OLUCHI M. IJEZIE.
TUTOR, THE SCHOOL OF FRIENDSHIP.
NIGERIA.